Monday, February 9, 2009
Empty nest scares the crap out of me
Well yesterday my baby got his first car and tonight he starts drive right. I am not old enough to have 3 grown boys. I swear just yesterday they were sweet little kids! I met my children 12 years ago. My baby was 4 years old now he is driving. What the hell happened. I can't even remember my life before kids. My 17 year old isn't talking to me right now but hopefully it is a phase. I think all parents have teenager battle wounds/scars. I have made many mistakes, becoming a wife and mother at the same time was hard. I have terrific parents and wanted to be the perfect parents too. I love the boys with my whole heart and just want what is best for them and to keep them safe. We might not always like their choices but we always love them. I wish I could go back in time and do some things different but I wonder would my boys be the men they are now? My oldest lost all his boyish looks. Somehow overnight he turned into a very handsome grown man that we are so proud of. I hate the thought of my boys growing up and not needing us.
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Ditto. I am going through those same empty feelings right now April. I always hope that someday, when my kids have kids of their own that they will forgive me for any mistakes I have made and most importantly that they realize that I did my best. I wish someone would have told me that being a parent when they are little is the easy part. Parenting teenagers is the hardest thing I've ever done.
ReplyDeleteanyone who claims to be a perfect parent is delusional. We all make mistakes, some more than others. I have a lot of regrets and a lot of guilt.
ReplyDeleteI can only pray to be forgiven for my shortcomings and stupidity.